How Does EMDR Work? What It Feels Like to Heal from the Inside Out
Let’s be honest, EMDR therapy doesn’t exactly seem to make sense initially. Eye movements? Trauma processing? Something about the brain? It can feel like stepping into unfamiliar territory with no map. However, once you understand how EMDR works, it’s like putting the pieces of the puzzle together.
Have you ever found yourself lying in bed, wide awake, trying to calm anxious thoughts or panic that keep circling back? Feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or panicked isn’t always related to a single traumatic event. Often, it’s about multiple instances of painful, disturbing, or traumatic experiences. Your body holds these experiences. Your brain has not been able to fully process them. That’s where eye movement desensitization and reprocessing can help.
In this article, we’ll explore:
What is EMDR therapy and how does it work
Benefits of EMDR therapy
When should EMDR be used
It’s not about reliving your history. It’s about releasing the pain you’re holding so you can exhale.
What Is EMDR Therapy And How Does It Work?
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a brain-based form of psychotherapy created by Francine Shapiro. It uses sets of rapid eye movement or other bilateral stimulation to help the brain process traumatic memories that haven’t been fully processed.
There are eight phases of EMDR therapy that serve as the structure for an EMDR session:
History & Treatment Plan – mapping PTSD symptoms, disturbing events, and themes.
Preparation – learning grounding skills and resourcing to lessen feelings of distress.
Assessment – targeting the negative belief, positive belief, image, and body sensations to prepare for desensitization.
Desensitization – bilateral stimulation to reduce emotional distress and help the brain reprocess the memory.
Installation – anchoring a positive belief that now feels true.
Body Check – noticing if there are any lingering physical sensations.
Closure – grounding before you leave the session.
Re-evaluation – next visit, assess how the distressing memories feel and if more reprocessing is needed.
What does the research say about EMDR effectiveness?
EMDR is supported by research and used by the Department of Veterans Affairs to treat PTSD. It often works faster than talk therapy, with long-lasting benefits for anxiety, trauma, and disturbing experiences.
Bilateral Stimulation: What It Actually Feels Like
During stimulation, your therapist moves a light or fingers across your gaze, or offers gentle taps/tones. Clients often describe:
Soft, rhythmic eye sweeps, which can feel almost meditative
A sense of warmth or tingling may arise as the nervous system begins to respond, common in work related to stress disorder patterns
Brief waves of emotion followed by a settling sense of calm
A 1998 VA study found 77 % of combat veterans no longer met criteria for post-traumatic stress disorder after 12 sessions of EMDR treatment.
Why “Processing” Doesn’t Mean “Reliving”
Your therapist guides the pace and structure of each phase, helping prevent overwhelm or emotional flooding.
You stay present and in control—you can pause, check in, or shift focus at any point.
While emotions may arise, you’re not re-experiencing the trauma—you’re processing it in a supported, grounded way.
Because of its effectiveness, the World Health Organization names EMDR an evidence-based treatment for trauma, and both the Department of Defense and Veterans Affairs list it as a first-line option for treating PTSD in service members
Benefits of EMDR Therapy
Now that you have a better understanding of how EMDR works, let’s explore what it can actually offer. This isn’t just a theoretical approach—it’s a practical, body-based method of healing that reaches the deeper layers. Whether you’re carrying stress that never quite settles, holding onto memories that still carry weight, or navigating beliefs that quietly shape how you see yourself, EMDR therapy helps support the release of long-held emotions and experiences.
It’s not about erasing your past. It’s about transforming how it lives inside you. Let’s take a closer look at the real-world benefits my clients often experience, from emotional relief to renewed self-compassion and even some unexpected positive shifts in the body and mind.
From Overwhelm to Calm
One of the clearest benefits of EMDR therapy is how it helps reduce the intensity of emotional overwhelm. Whether you're navigating complex PTSD, anxiety, or long-buried stress from traumatic experiences, EMDR helps the brain to function as it’s meant to: to process traumatic memories so they can be filed in the mind where they exist, but you feel emotional distance from them.
Using bilateral movement (like side-to-side eye tracking), EMDR stimulates both hemispheres of the brain to access the brain’s natural healing system. This mirrors what happens during REM sleep, our body’s way of consolidating memories. According to the Adaptive Information Processing model, distressing memories get “stuck” and continue to trigger emotional and physical responses. EMDR helps reprocess those memories so they no longer carry the same emotional charge.
Clients often describe feeling:
less easily triggered by stressful situations
fewer symptoms of PTSD (i.e., panic, hypervigilance, or numbness)
a sense of groundedness or calm they hadn’t felt in a long time, if ever
A meta-analysis published in Frontiers in Psychology confirms the effectiveness of EMDR therapy across multiple mental health conditions beyond PTSD.
What happens during EMDR?
After answering a few questions as part of the protocol, you notice your responses, along with an aspect of a distressing memory, called a target, while following a light, tone, or tap that moves side to side. Each phase of EMDR therapy helps your brain reprocess the memory so it no longer feels overwhelming.
Reclaiming Clarity & Confidence
Clients come into EMDR carrying negative beliefs such as “I’m not good enough,” “I’m defective,” or “I’m unlovable.” Through the structured eight phases of treatment, EMDR replaces those old, negative beliefs with new, positive beliefs that feel true.
After a few successful EMDR sessions, women often tell me:
“I feel like I can finally exhale.”
“I didn’t realize how much that memory was influencing my life today.”
“I’m not as hard on myself. It’s like something shifted.”
Whole‑Body Peace
Trauma isn’t just about the mind. It’s also held in the body. You might carry it as tightness in your chest, a pit in your stomach, body aches and fatigue, or a persistent unease that feels like it’s always there. EMDR therapy doesn’t just work with thoughts; it works with body sensations tied to psychological trauma.
With time, clients notice:
Reduced muscle tension or aches
Decreased headaches or digestive issues
Better sleep and energy
The goal of EMDR isn’t to erase life experiences. It’s to help you hold them where they are no longer front and center in your life, which can help you feel safe in your body again. To move through the world with a little more clarity, self-compassion, and trust in yourself.
When Should EMDR Be Used?
Although EMDR was developed to treat combat-related PTSD, decades of research on EMDR now show it’s a versatile, brain-based form of therapy that can help you heal from a wide range of life experiences.
Not Just for “Big T” Trauma
Beyond PTSD. Meta-analyses reveal EMDR reduces depression and anxiety with remission rates that rival (and sometimes outrank) CBT and other talk therapy approaches.
Loss & grief. A 2024 review found EMDR effective for prolonged grief, helping clients process the pain without getting trapped in it.
Everyday overwhelm. Burnout, perimenopause-related stress, perfectionism, and stuck negative beliefs (“I’m not good enough”) all respond well because EMDR targets the negative memory networks that keep distress tethered to you.
Signs You Might Benefit
If any of these feel familiar, EMDR could be the right next step in your treatment of trauma:
Persistent ruminations: the same story replaying despite your best efforts to stop the thoughts..
Feeling “stuck” in an emotional loop: panic, shame, or tense body sensations that prevent you from being in the present moment.
Physical fatigue, headaches, or a pit in your stomach triggered by reminders of a disturbing event from the past.
Pushing yourself to distract from the discomfort, yet still sensing the unprocessed traumatic memories stored in the brain and body.
Because EMDR therapy is a structured eight-phase protocol that uses gentle bilateral stimulation, its goal is simple: restart the brain’s natural capacity to process painful memories and store them where they belong, so you can move forward with more clarity and emotional freedom.
How does EMDR work scientifically?
The process mimics REM sleep using bilateral stimulation to access both sides of your brain. This helps release stored trauma, process it so it feels more distant and not front and center, and instill positive beliefs about yourself as a person.
How I Use EMDR to Help You Heal and Reconnect
If you’re a midlife woman carrying the weight of burnout, self-doubt, perfectionism, or complex trauma, EMDR therapy might help you reconnect to yourself. My work blends the structured, evidence-based process of EMDR with deep empathy and a supportive therapeutic relationship, so you’re not just treating symptoms, you’re healing from trauma in a way that honors who you are and your story.
Here’s what you can expect:
Gentle, attuned pacing through each phase of EMDR therapy
Focused support for the nervous system, body, mind, and your story
A space to reconnect with clarity and self-compassion
How to Take the Next Step
Curious? Let’s explore whether working together would feel right for you. Click here to schedule a free consultation.
